Since Weigh Down and Remnant I have been delivered from:
- overeating
- depression
- antidepressants
- Ritalin
- terrible shyness & fear of people
- rebellion to my parents
- selfishness
- laziness
- seeking praise of man
- a complaining spirit
All my life I'd been increasingly shy, self-preserving, selfish and self focused--among other ugly things I'm sure. From a very young age I focused on getting MY way and was absolutely miserable for it. My mother owned a daycare, and I despised having to share "my" home with other children. Not only did I behave horribly because of this, but I actually felt sorry for myself that I wasn't well-liked and felt I was actually a very nice person and everyone else was cruel. I was a liar and a sneak, I always fought with my brother, I hardly ever smiled and I hated doing chores or homework. My behavior led to me being put on Ritalin.
These issues continued as I got into my teens and things got worse as I became addicted to the internet. All my relationships were with people I met on multiplayer online games. I was always seeking love and friends who would be true to me, but was always disappointed. The hole in my heart got larger and larger as I kept trying to fill it with new games, new animes (Japanese cartoons), new online relationships and food. In 2000 I became a "Christian" after my mom had done the same after finding Weigh Down. My relationship with God was one of fear without love for a while. I was always thinking about the end of the world and how I didn't want it to come, and wondered how anyone could look forward to it. As I got more involved in the churches I attended, I gradually lost the fear. I was taught that I couldn't lay down sin all the way and didn't have to. (This is why I now consider those teachings counterfeit, because the Bible says otherwise.)
Despite the delusion I was in, deep down I had a desire to please God and have a real relationship with Him, but I didn't know what He wanted. I gained "friends" and a "belonging" and I was happy for myself, but I knew I didn't have the relationship with God that I needed and I would cry to God each night. My behavior had seemed to improve, but I was not a 100% new creation. I was still addicted to video games, internet, and anime--fantasies and escapes from actual life. I was never satisfied. I turned to anti-depressants and became numb to good feelings and remained unhappy. I also had a huge crush on a boy at church and I was always thinking about him. All this time I was unknowingly gaining weight, as I had never really obeyed God's way of eating.
During all this, Mom had turned from Weigh Down and had gained her weight back, but in 2003 she repented, returned and found Remnant Fellowship! She soon joined and I followed a few months later, which meant leaving the church I was in. I took a while to leave the church and even longer to leave the youth group, but when I finally decided to cut off completely from it all, it was then I really started seeing how COOL and what a HERO God is!! It was so exciting standing up for truth in the heat of the initial attacks from those who defended continuing in sin, and gaining a closer relationship with the LORD. The more I saw of the TRUE believers, the more convinced I became that I could actually be SET FREE from SIN!! This was horrible news for my selfish sinful nature, but AWESOME news for my heart for God!
I have only been in Remnant Fellowship since fall of 2003, and because of the teaching and example presented 24/7 by our godly leadership, I have been changed greatly. I'm no longer on Ritalin or anti-depressants; I use the computer only for what God wants; I don't care for video games or anime anymore; I've lost my excess weight; I love chores, obeying my parents and serving others as unto the Lord; I am kinder; I smile all the time; I'm not afraid of man anymore and don't get embarrassed or scared in front of people anymore; I can share truth in public areas with confidence; I love reading the Bible and writing to my brothers and sisters in Christ; each day is to be devoted to God and not self; I want God as LORD; I am free from the bondage to my old "friends" and totally thankful that God rescued me from getting with that boy I had a crush on; I see creation as beautiful everyday; I'm healthier; I love my job and serving my employer; my prayers are being answered... there is so much to be thankful for, because it is all completely God!! To sum it all up: my life was a mess, I cried out to God, He answered me with truth poured out through Remnant Fellowship, and the fruit of obedience to Jesus Christ is that my life is better than I ever thought possible. If you've been in slavery to sin, take heart and seek out the truth from the Bible taught in Remnant Fellowship and the Weigh Down Workshop, and be set free to live for God!